Remember the last time you received a real authentic compliment and how you felt? Hopefully it hasn’t been so long that you’ve forgotten!
And by this, I mean receiving real praise – thoughtful and heartfelt, delivered in a personal and meaningful way. Even better if such praise came in public, in the presence of others, who could share your victory, your fulfillment, even if it only lasted for a few moments.
You can physically see this expressed on peoples’ faces. After all, where do we think the phrase, you could see his entire face light up, came from? Palpable, discernable, unmistakable – the powerful effect of recognition, artfully delivered.
When we receive this kind of sincere, positive feedback, we walk a little taller, stride more confidently, and smile a little bit more. And we think, wow, that really made my day!
I recently came across the results of a survey conducted by Boston Consulting Group in which 200,000 participants were asked to list the top factors for on-job happiness.
What would your answers be? Think about it. Remember, the question is about ‘happiness’. Okay, time’s up. What’s your answer?
Could it be:
An attractive salary?
Interesting job content?
Learning and career development?
Nope. None of those even made the Top 5!
The number one response? Simply, appreciation for their work.
Let’s reflect a moment to put that into perspective. Regardless of your field of endeavor, consider all the many activities and conversations that transpire everyday between colleagues and also between colleagues and their leaders. Now, contrast that with how relatively few of those involve true recognition of an individual’s efforts or results. The paradox of how important it is to be recognized - leading to happiness - and how relatively infrequently it occurs, by comparison, is stunning.
So then, why don’t we see effective recognition done more? Author Stephen Covey describes the difference between people with an abundance mindset where a person believes there are enough successes to share with others, and a scarcity mindset, where that isn’t the case. Yes, once again, mindset matters.
Could this also shed some light on why some otherwise capable and talented leaders never become those extraordinary people that motivate and inspire us to achieve above and beyond? In my journey, and likely yours, those special leaders innately understand, and consistently practice the art of recognition.
Effective recognition takes many forms, from the simplest acknowledgement to the intricacies of a specially tailored, custom fit compliment. Let’s begin with some of the basics for leaders:
Take the time to get to know people and call them by name. Obviously, a must for direct reports, but even more importantly in your extended team and across the enterprise, as the opportunity arises. Speaking to people by name in a group setting and asking a simple question about something you know they have an interest in, shows you care – both to them and to the others watching. Reaffirming, once again, the adage “people don’t care what you know, until they know that you care”.
Recognition needs to be sincere, genuine, meaningful to the individual and timely. A handwritten note, a handshake personally delivered, a picture taken with a team commemorating an important ‘win’ are all excellent examples. Many times, I’ve seen these end up proudly on display in a team member’s workspace, where it re-ignites the emotions with every glance and reinforces that they are valued and appreciated. Remember also, to be most effective, recognition needs to be closely linked to the accomplishment. It literally has a shelf life – don’t delay!
Find the right balance, keeping it special. Overdoing it can marginalize the impact and could even make it seem contrived. No science here on recommended frequency; it is a gut feel based on your read of the situation. Target ‘appropriate’, with a lean toward ‘slightly more’ being better than ‘slightly less’.
Praise in public. Do this and watch faces light up! A particular best practice is to praise an individual to others when that individual is not around. Their colleagues then help spread the word in re-telling the event, magnifying the effect when the recipient hears it from multiple sources.
Now, for a true ‘next level’ skill that separates and defines the very best, look to “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There” by Marshall Goldsmith:
Listen to people in a way that makes them feel like they were the only one in the room. Dr. Goldsmith writes that this means listening, actively and attentively, blocking out all other distractions and thoughts so we may focus solely on the person we are with. Show interest by asking questions and listening attentively for their answers. Make the person you are speaking with feel like the most important person in the room, that they are the only one who matters.
All of these share the basic principle, showing people through both words and actions, that they are important, appreciated and valued and their contributions matter. They are recognized.
A while back, in a similar article, I once noted that trust was the cornerstone of high performing teams. If so, recognition must be their oxygen. It is that essential.
Maya Angelou once remarked “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Whose day have you made lately?
Authored By: Jeff Boyer, Managing Director
